[Wednesday]

Being estranged from my family of origin, Mother's Day was never much to me. But my husband was close to his mom, and this is his second Mother's Day without her. I can tell he's thinking about it, but he doesn't want to talk about it.

I'd love to hear any tips to support a partner dealing with a parental loss even a long time after. I don't have a frame of reference for this and am still not sure what's helpful and what's annoying.

[Gin]

In my experience, grief doesn’t really follow a timeline and holidays, birthdays, anniversaries and stuff can bring those feelings back to the surface even when years have passed. The fact that you’ve noticed he’s feeling it, even if he’s not talking, already says a lot about how much you care.

I think the most helpful thing is just to create space for him to feel whatever he’s feeling, without trying to fix it. And small gestures, like making his favorite dinner, getting his favorite comfort foods (clearly food is my love language) or suggesting an activity he enjoys like catching a movie, playing a game, or whatever, can provide comfort without requiring words.

Just your presence, without the pressure to talk unless he wants to, is often enough. And he might open up about it on his own.

Not sure what things really meaningful to him, but is there something he might want to do to honor his mom on Mother's Day? I'm not a fan of visiting the dead at grave sites, because I feel like they stay with us no matter where we are, but if there's something that might be meaningful to him in some way, maybe he'd want to do that?

[Wednesday]

We talked it out and decided to have breakfast for dinner (her favorite) and then FaceTime with his sister to tell stories. So all pleasant things that honor her.

[SummerDay]

We talked it out and decided to have breakfast for dinner (her favorite) and then FaceTime with his sister to tell stories. So all pleasant things that honor her.

I love that idea. I've never been a Mother's Day kind of person (same with birthdays and anything else that's a "big day") but this sounds really sweet, and a perfect thing to do.

[SummerDay]

How was everything on Mother's Day? Wednesday

[Wednesday]

Thanks for asking. It was chill and nice. No drama, which is the best I could hope for.